Jackaby

A wise bunny once told me:

“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

Oops.

Ugh.

I considered not typing out this review, but realized that it would totally break my streak of reviewing every book I’ve completed so far this year. So here I am.

Jackaby was written by William Ritter and narrated by Nicola Barber (yes, I know! Another audiobook! I’m on a roll!) Let me get my first complaint out right away, since it didn’t have anything to do with the author’s work: The narration of Jackaby. And Charlie. And Marlowe who’s name is spelled wrong. Why is there an E?. Nicola Barber is a British voice over actress, and while that was fine for Abigail BUT UGH IT WAS FIRST PERSON all the American men just sounded awful. Especially Jackaby. His Ks were the worst think I have ever heard: miss rooKK, looKK at this, they tooKK. Ewwwwwww.

Bored, Bored, Bored

This was a paranormal mystery. I was promised some sort of Sherlock and Doctor Who crossover feels. But noooooo….. You people lied, okay? Sherlock Holmes keeps me guessing and trying to figure out Who Done It the whole time. Doctor Who gives me action, adventure, and sometimes the heebie jeebies. And I got none of that. The mystery wasn’t engaging or mysterious, honestly, the heebie jeebies weren’t had, and Jackaby explained too much along the way. I was so bored with this story.

Annoyed

Thing 1: Abigail is a runaway (though, admittedly, an adult runaway), who NEVER ONCE writes to her parents. And I mean, she’s not like – in the next state over. Oh, no. SHE CROSSED THE ATLANTIC OCEAN to find a new adventure and DOESN’T TELL ANYONE. Are you kidding me?! One of the first places this woman goes in her new town is the post office. I KNOW YOU KNOW HOW TO WRITE, ABIGAIL.

Thing 2: Dude. This book should have ended at least four different times. Think Lord of the Rings movies, except not enjoyable. And then when it actually ended, there was more story! which was actually my favorite bit of the whole thing. Jackaby tells a brief history of one of his strange objects

The One Good Thing

Okay, fine. I’ll say something nice. Abigail Rook knows how to stand up for herself when men tell her that things aren’t good for a lady’s disposition (whatever that’s supposed to mean). She knows her worth, and she knows she can do a great job, and she defends herself in words, actions, and by pounding a paranormal creature over the head with books because he wants to soak up her blood.

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Have you read this book? Did you love it and I’m just a hater? Tell me in the comments what you thought. I’d love to hear a different perspective on this.